September 11th -- 6 Years Later

I wasn't going to do this, but I've been thinking about it all day.. and I make it a ritual to visit the September 11th Victim Site on every anniversary.. to remember those that died.. to honor them.. to never forget.

And it never fails that this anniversary rolls around and it brings the pain of remembrance and makes me increasingly angry.. I'm angry that:

* There were 2,974 deaths in the World Trade Center, American Airlines Flight 11, American Airlines Flight 77, United Airlines Flight 175, United Airlines Flight 93 and the Pentagon.
(These deaths do not include the 19 hijackers, who don't deserve counting)

* By December 2001 there were at least 3,767 Afghan civilian deaths (and many more since)

* As of 9 September 2007 there were 617 coalition deaths in Afghanistan: 372 American, 76 British, 70 Canadian, 25 German, 21 Spanish, 11 French, 10 Dutch, 9 Italian, 5 Romanian, 4 Danish, 2 Estonian, 2 Norwegian, 2 Swedish, 1 Australian, 1 Czech, 1 Finnish, 1 Polish, 1 Portugese and 1 South Korean.

* As of 9 September 2007 there were 1,553 Americans wounded in Afghanistan, and 52 Germans (among many others)

* As of 26 August 2007, the Lancet Study estimates that 654,965 Iraqi civilians have been killed since March 2003. There have been 3,760 American deaths and 27,279 wounded. At least 933 civilian contractors have been killed and nearly 13,000 wounded. 102 journalists have died, along with 39 of their support workers. 88 aid workers have been killed, 2 Australians, 13 Bulgarians, 1 Czech, 7 Danish, 5 El Salvadorians, 2 Estonians, 1 Hungarian, 33 Italians, 3 Latvians, 2 Dutch, 21 Polish, 2 Romanians, 4 Slovakians, 1 South Korean, 11 Spanish, 2 Thai, 18 Ukrainians, 168 British, and 1 from Kazakhstan.

All this death.. and so many lives changed forever.. and yet..

THAT MURDEROUS F**CKING BUTCHER OSAMA BIN LADEN IS STILL ALIVE AND AT-LARGE

So yes, I AM ANGRY. I WANT JUSTICE FOR THE VICTIMS OF SEPTEMBER 11TH.

A Wedding in the Shire

Becoming Mrs. Stubborn German was a quiet affair.. there was no fanfare of trumpets, no outrageous extravaganza, and no 12-person bridal party.. but it was just what we wanted. Simple. No fuss. Just two hearts committing to paper what we already know.. that we are two halves made complete by loving each other..

I was born to love this man. And he was born to love me.. really, we have been destined for this journey from birth..

We got up early on Tuesday morning (28 August) and loaded the car to leave for Dänemark. We had to be there by noon to give our final paperwork to the Bürgerservice and meet with Ms. Andreas at the Nyborg Rathaus. So we left at 8am, and drove the 2 hours to get there.. It was the first time either of us had really been to Dänemark, but the drive was easy and Insel Fyn (Funen Island) is pretty hard to miss because of the huge bridge you have to cross to reach it.

We arrived at the Bürger office at quarter of 11am, and learned that Ms. Andreas was busy performing another wedding. So we gave our documents to the nice lady that was there (who spoke English thankfully!), and walked around the town of Nyborg for about an hour to kill time until Ms. Andreas was available.. We took pictures, of course, and scouted out a place to have a meal later in the afternoon.

After the meeting, we went to Juelsberg Herregaard to check into our room.

Juelsberg lies just outside the town of Nyborg, on the east coast of Insel Fyn. It is an estate with a large mansion, owned by the family of the Baron Juel since 1775. It is surrounded by 38 acres of parkland, with its own private golf course, a lake, and a Pavilion/Tea House which was built in 1843. The park is open to visitors, but the house is reserved for the Juel family and their guests.. they have opened a bed and breakfast in the west wing of the mansion. Michael and I both highly recommend it for a romantic weekend, and you can see it here http://www.juelsbergslot.dk/ , although the site is only in Danish.

We spoke with our hostess, who showed us to our room and private living area, as well as the old manor kitchen, where breakfast would be served the following morning.. Then she left us to our own devices to explore the grounds.. The park surrounding the mansion is lovely and understated, with large expanses of green lawns rather than a bunch of formal gardens. We explored for a little over an hour, and decided to return to Nyborg search of dinner.

We decided to go ahead and have our 'wedding dinner' on Tuesday, so we could leave Dänemark immediately after the ceremony and pictures. Michael had to be at work on Thursday, and he wanted to get back to Deutschland early. He did take a month off to spend time with me when I arrived in June, and we will eventually plan another getaway later, but we haven't decided where.. and we already have a date in Dresden in November!

So we had dinner at Central Cafeen, which was a very nice cafe, although the service was a little slow (to me).. but what do I know about the Danish? I ordered the Vol-au-Vent, which is a puff pastry stuffed with cheese, lobster and white asparagus, garnished with caviar. It came with a salad and fresh rolls. Michael had calf's liver with roasted mushrooms and onions, and a bowl of French onion soup, and afterward we had fresh smoked Danish cheese with chives and carraway, which was served with toast points.. it was all very good food, although I don't care for liver, so I didn't try it, but I did taste the mushrooms and they were delicious.. Were we eating French food in Dänemark? How funny.. and I am such a blondie for just noticing that fact while typing this.. lol. But the cheese was definitely Danish.

Then we were off to drive around the island for the rest of the afternoon.. and Michael, knowing my love for books and my fascination with history, took me to see Castle Glorup (Glorup Slot in Danish, Schloss Glorup in German), which is where Hans Christian Andersen wrote most of his tales.

Glorup was the inspiration for much of his work, and he visited the estate often when taking a break from his other travels. It is a lovely estate on eastern Funen, and was built by the Walkendorf family about 1400. During its long history, the castle was owned by several Danish families, and came under the ownership of Count Adam Moltke-Hvidtfeldt in 1796. His family was one of the original four families that owned Amalienborg in Copenhagen, until the Royal Family purchased the properties in 1794 and made it their winter home. Moltke's Palace is now known as Christian VII's Palace.

It was the Moltke family that H.C. Andersen visited at Glorup. The park surrounding the estate was designed between 1862-1875, and since 1700, the site has been known more for its park than for the castle itself. All of it is still still privately owned, but the park is open to visitors.

I'm afraid that Michael and I did trespass a little on the castle grounds, but neither of us read Danish.. so we happily strolled around in ignornace.. there wasn't another soul in the place on a Tuesday afternoon and thankfully, no one came out to arrest us..

We also glimpsed Volksted Castle on the way back to Juelsberg, but its apparently privately owned and not open to visitors.. still, I got a pretty good picture.. after all, Insel Fyn is not known as the 'land of a hundred castles' for nothing!

Back at Juelsberg, we were both tired after a day of sight-seeing, so we relaxed and turned in early.. there are no phones or radios or TVs in the rooms there, except in the salon, and the estate itself is very quiet at night.. I'm not going to lie, we really were tired and the salon went unused during our stay.. we both went to bed so we could get up early.. as Michael says it takes eternities for a woman to get ready to go anywhere..hehe.. but I told him that brides get special dispensation, and can take as long as they want.. he didn't really have a reply.. he just pressed his German lips together and gave me a look of resignation. And I grinned back.

On Wednesday we woke to a lovely, crisp morning with a slight mist on the grounds surrounding the mansion.. we got up at 7am, got showers, and I primped until 9am (of course, my husband was dressed and ready in 15 minutes!), when we went down to breakfast in the old manor kitchen. It was lovely and quiet (there was only one other couple staying there besides us), and everything was laid out for us on a big square table in the middle of the room..

Fresh rolls with a selection of honey, tangerine marmalade and strawberry jam, a selection of cheeses, fresh melons and plums, a wonderful Danish sausage, banana smoothies, coffee & tea, several natural cereals with fruits and poached eggs.. Europeans really know how lay on breakfast! There were even candles lit around the room and on our table.. very romantic and intimate. Needless to say, I don't really miss American breakfast food. Grits? Nein.

After breakfast, I took my last cup of tea upstairs and finished getting ready for the ceremony, while Michael packed up the car. He looked so handsome in his suit and tie, that I seriously considered dragging him back to our room.. but that would have ruined my lipstick.

We left for the Nyborg Rathaus at 10:30am.. the photographer we hired was already there, and so was Ms. Andreas and our witnesses. We were married in the Mayor's office, in both German and English. Then we signed the paperwork, received congratulations from Ms. Andreas and our witnesses, got our marriage certificate and it was done!

The Rathaus gave me a delightful little crystal vase , stamped with the Seal of Nyborg, as a wedding present, and the photographer took additional pictures afterwards, which we should get in a week or two..

It is a German tradition that the bride wears her gown all day on the day of the wedding.. and I did observe this tradition, because we drove back to Deutschland after the pictures were taken, without stopping to change clothes. I didn't mind it really, since I won't ever wear a wedding dress again, but I did manage to slip out of the crinoline in the car.. otherwise, my husband would have had a roasted bride by the time we got home.. seriously, wearing one of those things can cause heat stroke!

We got back in good time, and there were surprises waiting at home.. Background: when Michael first moved into our apartment I was, of course, still in America. He gave a key to our BFs across the hall in case of emergency or package deliveries, and then promptly forgot that they still had it..

When we arrived back, our front door was decorated with a giant heart and tin cans! There were rose petals on the doorstep.. and throughout our apartment (the key, remember?). They had blown up a thousand and one balloons too, and filled our bedroom with them.. which makes me wonder if they had drinking glasses pressed against the wall that night.. if they did, they got an earful, because we took pins and popped every one of those balloons.. it sounded like cherry bombs going off.. lol.

As soon as they realized we were home, they came over with a couple of bottles of champagne to toast us, and hear all about our trip. Then it was to the backyard, to have more pictures taken, while everyone in our building came out on their balconies to snap their own pictures and wish us well. I'm sure there were a few lewd suggestions made to Michael, judging by the blush he developed, but he wouldn't tell me what they were.. damnit, I have to learn German.

It was late by the time we got back inside, so the BFs ordered out and we all had dinner together.. pizza and champagne.. before they went back home to leave us newlyweds alone... and run to press their ears to the wall I'm sure..

It was a lovely day and a happy occassion to play dress-up, but really our hearts were married in that moment, a long time ago, when we knew our souls were twin mirrors.. that we could not be separated by time or distance or language or culture.. that for us, happiness meant holding hands and travelling through life together...

It wasn't a choice. It wasn't a decision. It was simply.. truth.

This amazing love defines us and yet cannot of itself, be defined. It lives and breathes and grows.. has a life of it's own.. but cannot exist without us to nurture and sustain it. It must be defended at all costs, yet it demands complete surrender. And in the end, love becomes who we are. We live through it and are surrounded by it at the same time. It is also what we do.. with every heartbeat.. with every breath.. with every word, spoken and unspoken.. and with every touch..

When I feel your heart beating beneath my cheek.. when I hear your gentle breathing in the dark.. when I listen to you with my head and my heart.. when I feel the slightest brush of your hand.. It is Love. It's you. It's me.. and there's no distinction between the three..

Van Goethe said "Destiny grants us our wishes, but in its own way, in order to give us something beyond our wishes.. " And for Michael and me, our destiny lies soully in the hands of each other, as it did before, so it will again.. and yes.. it is beyond all our wishes.. this love.. this life.

So.. Shall we see where the road takes us, my darling? Give me your hand and let's walk together..

And.. Regarding the Ex-Pat Meet Up in Dresden

We are planning to attend, and we're pretty open about the dates. Looks like the latest tally is favoring November, which is fine with us. If anyone can let us know the final decision on the date, we'll start making our arrangements.. Michael's grandparents live in Sachsen, so going to Dresden gives him the perfect opportunity to let me meet them!

Lately on The Love Immigrant

I have to apologize again, I guess, for not posting more regularly than I should.. there have been some technical issues here. Namely, that with only one computer between us, I have only had time really to keep up with my family (and their endless emails), before relinquishing control back to Michael (who continues to work on his internet business).

We did order a brand new laptop for me 2 weeks ago. Last Monday it arrived in pristine condition, thanks to DHL, and I eagerly plugged it in and admired my new toy.. I didn't dare play with it until Michael came home, since the OS is in German and I promised to let him set it up for me in English. Needless to say, I waited patiently for him to return from work and I kept my mits off the damned thing (although now there is a slightly worn place in the carpet from my pacing).

So he arrives in the late afternoon, and he too admires the new toy, eager to play with it himself! He turns on the power and presto! A beautiful CrystalBrite screen in a lovely shade of blue.. of course, the OS setup is the first thing we see, and Michael makes himself comfortable on the sofa, cappuccino nearby, and proceeds to set up my new laptop... BUT... the keyboard is dead. Absolutely nothing happens when he presses the keys. NOTHING.

Looking through the box and packing material, we find the customer service number and Michael calls them right away.. while I try to overcome my disappointment and irritation. The man he spoke to was very accomodating, and told him that DHL would pick up the defunct item the next day. The company would either repair the problem, or they would send us a replacement by Friday. I know, it's too good to be true, isn't it?

Well, true to their word, DHL did pick up the package on Tuesday, as promised.. so I have been eagerly awaiting Fridays delivery of my repaired or replaced laptop. No. No. NO. Did they deliver it on Friday? Of course not. It was.. too good.. to be true.

After the mail arrived yesterday, minus the package I was expecting, I called Michael at work and let him know that we didn't get it.. So once again, he called the company, and they said they had repaired the problem (a loose wire) and had given it back to DHL for delivery.. So now we're hoping that it will come with today's mail.. we'll see, but neither of us are expecting it really until Monday, by which time we won't have time to mess with it, since we're leaving for Dänemark early Tuesday morning.. ho hum. And damnit!

All of this wouldn't have been so aggravating, had it not been for the fact that we decided to get a satellite system, so I can catch more English channels than CNN (how utterly boring). First, there was a problem with the receiver and the dish not working, so we took the whole thing back and got another one.. then, the receiver on that system was messed up, so we took back just the receiver. After 3 days of irritation and hours of programming, it is finally working.. but we are still entertaining murderous thoughts about the idiot who sold us the system to begin with.. ho hum. And damnit!

In between these problems, Michael has been tweaking our car for the trip, and last night worked on some problem with the power steering until well after dark. He came in looking like a grease monkey.. his hands were covered in black, and there were streaks on his arms and face and the tip of his nose. And you know what? He's even sexy covered in grease...

It was quite funny actually, because when I was still in America, he called me on the phone once and my father picked up the other extension (not knowing I was on it).. later Dad wanted to know who was the 'black man' I was talking to. This, of course, had me rolling in laughter, because evidently Dad's southern ears can't pick out the difference between European and African.. Michael and I have a running joke about that incident.. I should have taken a picture of my 'black man' for Dad, but I was in the middle of cooking dinner.

On the lighter side, we did order my flowers for the wedding, and they will be delivered on Monday (knock on wood), and this morning we went to the bridal shop and picked up Michael's shirt and tie. Then we both got hair cuts in Rendsburg.. they are having a festival this weekend, but we didn't hang around because we wanted to be back in time to get the mail.. just in case.

Doomsday

Tomorrow is the 27th of July... and on that day many many many years ago, a chubby, bald-headed, drooling baby was born. No it wasn't me.

Happy Birthday Wendee

I know she is having a great time at Barefoot Landing in Myrtle Beach right now. Her husband got her a tattoo.. and our mother is horrified!

Today is also the day we set the date for the wedding. It will be on 29 August. I am very excited.. and Michael? Well, I think he will survive (hehe).. provided he doesn't have to feed one more envelope for the announcements, or have anything to do with our printer for at least a year.

And I have officially quit eating... ok, I will officially quit when the Milka bar is gone. If I'm going to post our wedding picture here, believe me, you'll be glad. Unfortunately for me, this is the real meaning of Doom. Starvation. I've been sampling a little too much of the local cuisine since I've been here, though, and it's high time I get back on track anyway.

So I will say goodbye to Milka and noodles and bread.. and Michael's damned chocolate cappuccino (which is a sin all it's own)... Hallo! Vegetables! (I can hear my darling future husband groaning now! What is it with German men and their aversion to green, leafy things?)

Now I have to cut this entry short, 'cause I see my sister is online.. I guess it would be nice of me to wish the old witch a happy birthday. Hehe.

By the way, the above picture is the place we've chosen for the wedding..

Thanks to Sissy

Today I received my first package from America. It came from my sister, who sent me the contact lenses I ordered before I left.. my old contact lenses are daily wear and I hate them because I cannot wear them all the time.. eight hours and my head starts hurting.

But now I have the new ones.. the fancy ones.. with Hydroclear technology (whatever the hell that means). They feel like.. well, they feel like nothing on my eyeballs! And let me tell you it's great to finally get my extended wears back!

So thank you Sissy! She even got the address right (which is, if you knew my sister, quite frankly amazing). I had to sign for the package and everything.. hehe.

I guess that she's not really missing me as much as she claims, however, because the bitch didn't even send me a note..

News from Northern Germany

I know I've been slack.. and I've probably irritated the hell out of some of you who want to know what's going on with Michael and me... sorry. Ok, I'm not THAT sorry.. hehe. We've been busy.. and I've been adjusting to my new surroundings.. not to mention, trying to get used to the German keyboard and remembering that there are umlaute on there now.. ok, and the keys are misplaced somewhat (in my view anyway) but I will get used to it.. so, dear reader, if something gets misspelled here, you'll know why.

But now I have a chance to correct my slackness and post an update on the happenings in the north. I think I have been to almost every store in Rendsburg now.. hehe.. except the shuh stores, which Michael refuses to let me go in (and with good reason I suppose, since one whole suitcase I brought with me was filled with shoes.. and more are coming from America as I write this).

So far, we have only painted the living room walls, with 3 rooms left to paint, but the furniture has been delivered and Michael put together the closet we ordered from IKEA (an exercise in frustration I think, but he is a saint). Our apartment is lovely, by the way. I love it. We need pictures on the walls, but we're working on that... I did paint a canvas already and we hung it, but that project calls for another canvas and more paint.. I will get to it eventually. But I am no artist, really, so don't get the impression that I am.. I just like to dabble.

We got new light fixtures too.. not, to my chagrin, the red Maria Theresa chandelier I originally threatened to buy, but a black and white one that looks lovely over the dining table, and goes very well with the color of the room. I am very happy with it, even if it isn't red... but I did get my way with the red color anyway, and we have red pillows on our white sofas.. yes, I said white sofas.. I know. It's a foolish color for a sofa.. but at present we don't have any little ones to spill things on it.. aside from me (the Hobbit) that is... lol.

We've been to the plant store.. because first, I love to grow things. And second, I wanted my dearest love to make me pesto. So, four basil plants later, we have planters on the balcony (which is evidently a must in Germany) filled with lemon thyme, white marguerites, wire vine, mint, and of course, the basil... and also another of some small purple flower (don't ask me what it is) that has really vibrant blooms. I also got some fern and spider grass and three other plants I cannot name, for the living room - let's hope they all live.

And I have been to several grocery stores, of course. The cheeses here are amazing in variety and I love cheese.. as for the mayonnaise, well, there is no Duke's and no Hellmann's, but the kind I did try that Michael bought wasn't so bad.. I even made a good potato salad with it - American potato salad (or as close as could get without Duke's and India relish), and Michael liked it.. hehe.. at least he said it was good, but I don't know whether he was just being nice or if it was true.. to me, it was okay. But as far as I'm concerned, there's nothing to beat German mustard anywhere in America. Really. And I did find a good peanut butter here too.. well, Michael hates peanut butter, so there is more for me.. hehe.

I brought some jars of things with me from America in my luggage.. Canteloupe butter. Hot pickled okra. South Carolina honey. And a 2 lb bag of Plantation Rice (that we haven't opened yet, nor have we opened the butter). Michael likes okra! Surprise! He'd never eaten okra before, and I haven't seen it in the groceries here, naturally, but we did find some okra seed to grow it ourselves.. the time for planting it has passed, but maybe next year.. And since the jar I brought is almost gone already, I guess I will have to beg my sister to send more..

The wedding plans are moving forward too.. we have sent all the documents necessary for the wedding, and I brought my wedding dress with me... and no, Michael has been an absolute angel and he has not peeked to see the dress.. so we are trying to pick a date in the first week of August.. I'll let you all know when we decide. It will be a simple ceremony, but I will get to see a little of Dänemark, since that is where we will get hitched.. we've pretty much picked out where we will stay while there, and now we're just waiting for the approval to do it... for some weird reason, the Danish government has a holiday in the month of July and they don't perform weddings at all in this month.. otherwise, I would already be Michael's wife.. maybe he is glad for the respite.. to get used to the idea that he will never be separated from me again.. or maybe he just needs to evaluate what it's going to be like to have an American for a spouse.. hehe.

So far, we have had a wonderful time just being together. And as the days pass, it only gets better. I can't imagine being anywhere but here with him. Of course, I miss my family a little.. but only a little at this point... everything is too new.. too much of an adventure to really drive home the fact that I am thousands of miles from Mom & Dad & Sister & Brother & Friends. Maybe that will come later, I don't know, but I am not going to worry about it now because I'm having too much fun being here. Is that mean? Hmmm.. something to think about.

I know that most Americans have preconceived notions of what Europe is like, or not, depending on whether they pay attention to the news in other parts of the world besides their own, but sitting on the tarmac in New Jersey, I gave up all those notions and decided to just let the experiences come to me.. to try not to place my own imaginings, or apply them to any situation here. So I'm letting this new life happen on its own, without judgement of what should be, or what I think it should be.. like whether the eggs have to go straight to the refrigerator.

And Michael.. well, what can I say? He is the love of my life. He is wonderful. He is patient. And we must be two of the happiest people on the planet, because together we are complete. And we both know that one cannot live without the other. To me, his happiness comes before my own, and to him, I always come first.. so we will explore and discover this adventure together.. make our life here together, and conquer the challenges that we both know lie ahead of us. Because love is the reason I came to Deutschland, and when all is said and done.. home is where the heart is. And my heart belongs to a stubborn German.. Ich liebe dich, Michael.... mehr als mein leben.